Man Enough: Undefining My Masculinity

You are enough!

Justin Baldoni is an actor and director, who is known for his role as Rafael Solano on the television show, Jane the Virgin. This book was born out of a TED Talk that he presented entitled: Why I’m Done Trying to be Man Enough.  In the book, he admits that his goal was to attempt to “reframe the traditional messages of masculinity to be more inclusive and holistic.”  Each chapter begins with a title that is an implied question such as Brave Enough? Smart Enough? Confident Enough? and Successful Enough? According to him, each of these chapter titles represents subtle scripts that society embeds into the male psyche to compel men to constantly evaluate and measure their personal worth as a “real man.” They serve to maintain traditional gender roles in order to police our society’s binary one-size-fits-all view of gender.
The great thing about this book is that Baldoni is very candid, and at some points embarrassingly honest in recounting his own struggles about his attempts to measure up as a male over the course of his life.   Most importantly, he openly discusses the many ways in which our society’s gender messages have impeded his ability to not only become a better man, but a better human being.  This is a very timely book as we collectively continue to grapple with the evolving notions of gender.  Although it focuses on men, I think women would find it an interesting read as well.  And finally, overall, his mix of humor, spirituality and anecdotes make it a though-provoking read.